MAGA (2021)

MAGA is a response immediately following the Atlanta Spa Shooting on March 16, 2021.

The victims at Young's Asian Massage were Delaina Ashley Yaun, 33; Paul Andre Michels, 54; Xiaojie Tan, 49; and Daoyou Feng, 44. The victims at the Gold Spa were Hyun Jung Grant, 51; Suncha Kim, 69; and Soon Chung Park, 74. The victim at Aromatherapy Spa was Yong Ae Yue, 63.

It’s difficult to put my feelings onto paper or translate them to art but simply, I worry a lot about my parents and grandparents these days.

For my entire life, it has always been the other way around. They’re constantly nagging me with questions like: Why art? Why do you sleep so late? Why are you on the computer so much? That’s why you get sick. Did you eat yet? Do you have a job yet? Girlfriend? Grandchild, when? Despite all of that, I understand that it comes from a good place in their heart. I’m an only child, who else would they worry so much about? It’s odd now being in my early 20s, I’m now the one that worries everyday about their health, safety, and wellbeing. I’m constantly reading and watching the news and bringing them up in our conversations especially in the midst of a relentless global pandemic. On top of all the COVID-19 virus worries, I have to worry about another virus, hate.

It seems like lately all I’ve been consuming are news articles and videos of these atrocious hate crimes. I would ask them if they heard about the mom in New York that was randomly shoved and had to receive half a dozen stitches, I asked them about the Thai man that lost his life to a horrendous assault, and would contemplate if I should even show them the footage. The rise of anti-Asian rhetoric and hate crimes have soared at an alarming rate since the inception of the virus when the WHO declared it a pandemic on March 11th, 2020.

This past year has been horrendous and it’s just passed the 1-year anniversary of the pandemic. Like everyone else in the world, my life has been impacted and ravaged by the effects of the pandemic but I understood it and understood why, it is science, the virus doesn’t discriminate, it finds a host, replicates itself, and spreads to other hosts. It all makes sense to any educated individual. What didn’t make sense to me was why someone would feel the need to tackle a brittle elderly Thai man and stand over him an NFL linebacker making the biggest hit of the game. He died 2 days later from his brain injuries and I couldn’t find the space to understand why such hatred had to exist in this world. It made me think back to just over 10 years ago when my grandmother was mugged on Mother’s Day. She’s a brittle elderly Vietnamese woman that didn’t knock a lick of English but they saw her as an easy target and I’m seeing the same thing happen over and over the past few months. There was an incident in San Jose where a 64-year-old grandmother was attacked and robbed of the money she was planning on giving her family for Lunar New Years.

This angers me because Asian American grandparents go out of their way to NOT be a nuisance, to NOT be a problem for anyone, it’s just how they are, quiet, reserved, and hard working. Despite all that, they’re still preyed on and attacked just for who they are. These grandparents are part of this invisible group of minorities that came to a new country with nothing to their name and adopted that invisible mantra. You see it all the time but just don’t notice it, you see the Asian grandma or grandpa simply smile and nod at you and continue on with their day, going out of their way to not inconvenience anyone. I see it everyday with my grandma even 10 years after her mugging.

I was born and raised an American, I’m as American as anyone else in this country but despite all that, in just over the two decades I’ve been in this country, the most common derogatory phrase I’ve heard thrown at me and my family was, “go back to China! Ching chong, Ching chong, chink!” and I’m not even Chinese! I’m Vietnamese but they could care less, we’re all Chinese to them.

The truth is Asians have been discriminated towards for so long but it’s been overlooked, the coronavirus pandemic just gave people an outlet to put the blame on. We can look back at the Chinese Exclusion Act of 1882, the American colonization of the Philippines, the Japanese internment camps throughout World War 2, the story of Vincent Chin, the rampant racism against the Vietnamese after the Vietnam War, the SARS outbreak and the outcast of Asians, and of course the model minority myth that further divides minority communities. Anti-Asian sentiment has been deep rooted in American history, it’s hard to ignore now because communities are tired. We’re tired of being labeled as the model minority while being attacked with hate crimes fueled by the anti-Asian rhetoric of our past President, Donald Trump. Calling the COVID-19 virus the “kung flu” or the “Chinese virus” emboldens and fuels these hate crimes. It encourages so much hateful sentiment towards ALL Asians, people hear it and think it’s a greenlight to attack Asian Americans since we’re the cause of the pandemic. We’re not. We’re just as American as anyone else and this reminds me of a quote from Akmed Lorence in 1967, “All we’re asking for is humanity, we’re asking to be allowed to live like human beings. And god, you tell us that this is too much to ask.”

All I ask for is kindness. I see these explicit photos and videos of these Asian American elders being so violently attacked; I worry about my family. My family that gave up so much to start new lives in America only to be faced with a country that doesn’t even fully welcome them here. Who knows when their long tiring journey could be ended by some guy on the streets thinking they’re the reason why we’re in a pandemic? We don’t need to another Pak Ho, Juanito Falcon, Vicha Ratanapakdee, Christian Hall, and Angel Quinto to happen just so Americans can turn a blind eye. See what’s happening, understand what’s happening, and understand the pain the AAPI community is feeling.